#018: TrailNotes - SickTok & Trying to Be a Good Samaritan
Several random encounters with strangers in my community opened my eyes to the SickTok epidemic and the need to be a Good Samaritan.
This past Saturday, I went out to the river as I always try to get some time outdoors each week. This is how I recharge, step away from technology, and take care of my soul. Normally, I would just hop in my car and head west without interruption. Yet this trip would be different for a few reasons that were eye-opening.
This trip was unique because it only took me less than a single minute before I stumbled upon somebody that looked like they were desperately in need of help. I literally just exited my street and was just a few hundred feet from my house where I live. And I saw somebody hunched over on the curb on the sidewalk and I thought to myself, “oh boy, that person needs help.”
It was one of those moments that didn't feel optional. If any of you have experienced this, you know the feeling. You see somebody and you feel like you were predestined to help that person. There have been other times in my life where I have potentially saved a life, broken up arguments, ended bar fights by restraining very drunk men, or stepped in to bring a couple on the verge of divorce back together. I can't explain when it happens, but I just know that I'm there to help somebody.
So naturally, I thought it was one of those moments. I pulled over my car, parked it and got out and started walking toward the person that I thought was in trouble. And I didn't want to approach them to suddenly just in case maybe they had a weapon or something. So when I was about 15 feet away, I shouted, “Hey, you okay?”
And and the stranger responded after looking at me with some surprise, “Oh I’m good. I’m just looking at TikTok videos.”
I was caught off guard. I didn't understand why this person that I now saw was probably a 15 to 17-year-old kid would be hunched over on a busy road sitting on a curb, staring at his phone while it rested on the ground. His head was between his knees in a full-blown escape from the reality around him. And then I realized maybe even though he was physically okay there was something much deeper wrong with him.
I just responded, “You sure you’re good?”
And he said back smiling, “Yeah, I’m good. Thank you.”
And then I went back to my car and went straight to the river. I had more than an hour to think about the incident, but also though about what's going on in society at large that drives younger people to this escape that I'm calling, SickTok.
I can only imagine the video he was watching was probably not helpful to his growth. And I'm not here to judge because I was a teenager once too and I did a lot of stupid things when I was young. But I think the main difference is I was doing those stupid things with a group of friends and we didn't have screens to distract us from meeting in person.
I'm not saying that was better, it was just a different experience. I also wonder why on a beautiful Saturday afternoon he wasn't out playing sports or doing something fun with his friends. It really made me sad, and I think it cut into one of my deeper wounds from my own youth.
When I grew up, my parents were divorced, and my brother and I were shuttled back-and-forth between parents every week. So we didn't develop a lot of friendships because on weekends we were away from our local school friends. So I felt empathy for this kid because I know how it feels to be lonely on weekends.
That was the first encounter and I don't have a conclusion about it, but I do know that there is something behind the ‘SickTok epidemic’ that I want to explore further. I’m considering opening a TikTok account and sharing videos for youth like him that are lost, confused, and effectively homeless. They are all turning to TikTok to find community, to learn, and to understand the world around them. So why shouldn't I go there?
That was the first experience I had. The next one arrived after a wonderful day of fishing on my birthday. I caught five beautiful trout on what was a perfect May Saturday in Cheesman Canyon. I really couldn't have scripted a better time outdoors. I even recently shared my manuscript with another author that's a friend of mine and he said, “I think you need to change that scene in your book because it's too unrealistic and two idyllic.”
He might be right, but he doesn't know the experiences that I've had on the waters and trails of Colorado. It actually is idyllic here.
After a wonderful day on the river, I was walking on the trail back to the car, which is quite a long hike, and there are some steep inclines. Before I started the first incline, there's a section of the trail where you can pause to see an amazing view and reflect as the sun drenches the evergreen trees just above the flowing water beneath. I often like to observe that section as I walk out just to take a deep breath before I start a new week. But this time other people interrupted that plan.
Once again, somebody was putting in my path that I felt compelled to reach out to. But this time it wasn't somebody that was staring at a TikTok video. It was a romantic, newly engaged couple that looked madly in love with each other. But they were also both holding their phones, and I could tell they were attempting to take selfies. I understood why. They wanted to get lifelong pictures and remember their engagement on this special occasion.
I didn't hesitate to ask, “You guys want a picture?”
They responded, “That would be amazing, thank you!”
And so I took a series of landscape pictures that I'm sure will be printed and be put on their wall for a long time. Now it might sound like I'm dramatizing a basic encounter, and maybe I am. But when I'm glued to my work in a computer screen for most of the week and I have these in-person experiences, they actually leave a deep impression on me. They teach me because after both experiences I had an hour and a half or more to reflect on them. I’m very grateful to have this margin in my life. I feel very blessed and fortunate that I have time and space to think and reflect.
Maybe that's the point of this essay. I think everybody needs to SLOW DOWN a little bit and detach from your phones. And I'm not trying to do any kind of ‘holier than thou’ virtue signaling here either. I'm not saying that I'm better or more moral than you are. But I am saying that you have to intentionally be aware of your surroundings. If you stop caring about people that are hunched over on curbs, just 100 feet from where you live, then society begins to fall apart. So take this as an encouragement to keep your eyes open to people around you that might be in need of help, and your life will be richer for it.
Fortunately, when I was walking on the trail after I took the pictures of the newly engaged couple, I recorded my reflections on that day and I'm providing that video for you here. Enjoy the first edition of Trail Notes!